My IUI update

IUI #3 was completed on Friday and I am feeling really good about the timing. We arrived at my RE's office at 7:30 in the morning for Patrick to do his thing. And waited while everything was being prepared. Come 8 a.m. I was starting to feel O pains. And by 8:30 I was being inseminated with roughly 42 million of Patrick's finest. When all was complete my RE said everything went perfect. Patrick and I left my RE's office and went right home because my O pains were so severe it hurt to sit. I'm hoping that, that meant we had 4 good eggs. (Fingers crossed) so now begins the two week wait.

Sorry for being MIA

The past few days have been filled with many up's and downs. The week started off fine. Great follicle check on Tuesday and a busy day of shopping to finish up just in time for Christmas. Then I got the call Tuesday night while I was at home relaxing on the couch. It was my BFF calling to tell me that her step mother was diagnosed with stage 3 pancreatic cancer and given less then a year to live. I am very close to my BFF and her family, we have known one another for almost 17 years and they are like a second family to me. I could not believe what I was hearing, there was nothing I could say. Worse then knowing that someone you love has less then a year to survive is knowing that the death of my BFF's father would more then likely follow. My BFF's father is 86 years old and not in the best of health. The only thing keeping him going this far is that his wife takes amazing care of him. With both of them ill it does not leave much hope for his future. That alone put a damper on Christmas what also happened to be my BFF's birthday. In addition to the sadness that I was already feeling. I received a call on Christmas from a friend of mine telling me that for husband of 11 years served her with divorce papers on Christmas morning. After 11 years of marriage and 4 kids one being born less then two weeks earlier. He decided she was to controlling and he no longer wanted to be married. It breaks my heart to see so many people that I love and care for going through so much pain during a time that is suppose to bring joy. It has truly been an eye opening week for me. And so it has lead me to my New Years resolution. My resolution for 2009 is to get closer to all of my family. At any moment someone you love can be taken away from you be it by divorce or death. I have been horrible about spending time with my 86 year old grandmother and it has never crossed my mind that she is 86 and although I hope and pray that she lives forever it is inevitable that one day she will go. I also have a ton of family back east that although I talk to it is not as often as I use to. Also Patrick has not seen his father in almost 2 years, I think it is due time we forgive him for all of the wrong he has done to Patrick and rebuild there relationship. We have a lot of family that we need to reconnect with, and my goal for 2009 is to make that happen.

Follicle Check #2

I walked into my appointment today with a cheerful attitude refusing to let anyone get me down. Again nurse no blood made two attempts at drawing blood before calling over the other nurse that knows how to get the job done. I smiled and made small talk in attempts to keep things peaceful. I get taken back to the ultrasound room and assume the position. My RE walks in and I quickly smile and say my hello's. I think I caught her off guard so she smiled back. My results: on my right side I have 2 10mm follicles and on my left I have an 18mm and a 12mm. I sit up and she congratulates me on all my follicles and tells me that she believes I will have 2 if not 4 viable follicles come time of IUI. (funny since she called me a one egg kind of girl only a few weeks back) And it's funny how her demeanor has totally changed. Now that I have more eggs she has more of a personality. Very odd! I trigger at 8:30pm Christmas eve and my IUI is on Friday at 8:30am. Yeah!!!!!!!!!

My RE hates me

And if she doesn't she sure could have fooled me. Let me tell you how my appointment played out. I showed up at my exact appointment time 9:30. I walk into the lobby that is completely full of people, I find a place to take a seat and wait. Come ten o'clock we are all looking at one another trying to figure out why we are all still waiting. From the corner of my eye I see her entering through the back door. Well that explains it we are all waiting because she didn't come to work on time. People start to get called back and more people show up for there appointment's. Finally I get called back but it is not to see the Dr yet, it is to have my labs done. I again get the only nurse that can't draw blood. She makes 3 attempts and gives up. Hands me a bottle of water and says I must be dehydrated. (Although I know I drank a bottle of water on my way in so that is not possible.) I go back to the lobby and wait. 10 minutes later another nurse takes me back to try to draw blood from me. This one has no problem and within a minute I am put back in the lobby to wait. It's 10:25 and the nurse finally comes to take me back to the room for my ultrasound. I get undressed and assume the position. When my RE comes into the room she is very short with me. I ask her why the new higher dose of meds is making me black and blue at all of the injection sites and she looks at me like I have two heads. I lay down and the ultrasound begins. The monitor was not turned in my direction so I had a hard time seeing anything. She counts nothing on my right side but I swear I would see 2 or 3 small ones out of the corner of my eye. And two good size follicles on my Left. At no point did she tell me the measurements as she usually does. The entire time she is giving me the evil eye like I am the devil for doing my cycle during the holidays. Finally when I sit up to talk to her she says well you "might" (insert sarcastic tone of voice) have two follicles for your IUI. But like I said before Amy, you got lucky the first time. You might just want to get use to being on those injections for a while! Especially now that we confirmed that you have elevated levels of PAI-1. WTF! I can not believe she would say something like that. Plus the PAI-1 mutation only means I have to go on blood thinners when I do get pregnant. That would not hinder me getting pregnant. She exited the room and I quickly got dressed and took off. What a F$#king Bitch! I go back on Monday for my next follicle check and as long as I am still on track my IUI should be Friday or Saturday. In the mean time I made an appointment for a consultation with a different RE. I am just sick and tired of my current RE being such a bitch!

IUI #3 is underway

And tomorrow is follicle check #1. There better be more then one freakin egg in there. Or there is going to be hell to pay! Ughhhhh stress!!!!!!!!!!!!


(This is how I feel!!!!)

Hell has finally frozen over!!!!!!!!!!!!

For the first time in 20 years Vegas has had our first sticky snow storm. It has been snowing consistently for over 4 1/2 hours out by my house, and it is not melting as usual nor does it seem to be easing up any time soon. You can actually play in it and enjoy it. It it amazing!!!! Here are some pictures I thought I would share ...

These were taken around noon









These were taken around 1:30

These were taken around 4:30





I am sure I will have more pictures as the night progresses. There looks to be no end in sight... I love this weather!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tagged

Candi
tagged me to list 7 random facts about myself.Here are the rules:
1. Link to the person who tagged you.
2. Share 7 random and/or weird facts about you.
3. Tag 7 random people at the end, and include links to their blog


So here goes ...

1. I cry like a baby to Billy Joel. Not because I have a thing for him or anything like that, but because he reminds me of NY and only when I hear him sing am I reminded of how homesick I am.

2. When I was younger I was in a bowling accident and now I have a fear of bowling. I know it sounds hard to believe that such an accident can happen so I will share the story of how it happened. I was 9 and my parents took my sister and I bumper bowling. We had just started playing and I was first up. I was super excited that I knocked down a pin and while walking back to my seat somehow managed to slip and smash my face open on the ball return. My mother said there was a water on the floor that I slipped on. Regardless I ended up passing out and came to as my mother was laying me on the counter as we waited for my father and the car to run us to the hospital. I remember opening my eyes to two old ladies with white hair telling me that everything was going to be ok. I thought I had died. Anyway 48 stitches later you will not catch me bowling. I stay a safe distance away.

3. I ran away to Chicago when I was 17 to go visit my first love JR. I called my mother from payphones while I was there just to tell her that I was ok. When I came back home she didn't speak to me for a week.

4. I once got hit in the face with a maxi pad while driving in my old VW cabrio on the 15 freeway in San Diego. My Cousin had come out to visit me and we were out bar hopping downtown. For some reason we thought it would be fun to drop the top on our way home. Anyway something blew into the car and smacked me in the face right by my mouth. I quickly pulled it from my face just in time for my cousin to scream OMG that's a bloody pad. She peed in her pants she was laughing so hard. I on the other hand did not find it so funny. I went home and took a scalding hot shower. And to this day every time we see a VW cabrio she cracks up laughing thinking about my pad to the face experience.

5. I can't share drinks or utensils with anyone. If I am drinking from a can and someone takes a sip I give them my drink. The thought of not knowing where there mouth has been creeps me out. I'm getting better at this when it comes to Patrick but anyone else yuck!

6. I poke at my husband when he snores in his sleep and pretend to be asleep when he wakes up trying to figure out what is going on. I sometimes even use Molly's paw so that he thinks it's her. I don't know why I find this amusing but Patrick's snoring gets sooooooooooo bad when he drinks it keeps me from sleeping. Sometimes he even snores so loud that he wakes him self up mid snarf. So what I usually do is lay there in bed and poke him in the arm, pluck hairs from his chest or I take Molly's paw and paw at him. Then I quickly close my eyes and pretend to be asleep. I have been doing this for over 4 years and I still don't think he knows it's really me.

7. I hate things between my toes. So much so that if even the smallest string gets wrapped around my toe I throw up. My sister use to find this so amusing that she would sit on me and put the phone cord between my toes just to make me puke. To this day if I am getting a pedicure and they try to put cotton between my toes or those little foam flip flops on my feet I freak out.


I tag Lynn,
Chele,
Amber,
Shell,
Jenna,

Being a bitch sometimes pays off

Today I had an all out battle with my RE's office. It was me vs them and I was not going to let them win! I called bright and early to schedule my ultrasound since the DR said that today would be day 3 since Friday I was not heavy flow all day. No biggy! I call and get the office manager who must have been having a bad day and decided to take it out on me. She tried to tell me that I needed to go on BCP for a week while we waited approval from the insurance company. I quickly put my foot down. I have never had to wait a week to get an approval from my insurance company I said. What can I do to expedite this? Nothing! she said back in a nasty tone of voice. I will put the request in, in the next 5 minutes but that is all I can do. We hung up the phone and I called my insurance company. The girl informed me that an approval request can take up to 24-48 hours but that the RE's office could call in and try to get an exception if I had an appointment today. I quickly called my RE's office back to tell the manager what the insurance company had told me. Before I could even take a breath she replied back that's what they always say, but they never do it. So are you not willing to call I asked. No she said in a very stern tone. I was taken back for a second. I could not believe she would not even consider calling for me. You would think that what I was asking for was a big deal. We hung up the phone and I cried for a good hour or so. I could not believe that this is how my RE's office would treat a patient. What have I ever done to be treated like this. Patrick begged me to call the insurance company back and see if there was any other options for me. The girl that picked up my call was the nicest woman I have ever spoken to. She could tell that I had been crying and said she was going to help remedy this matter. I could tell by the way that she was speaking to me that she really meant it. She told me she would call me as soon as the request from my RE was in the system. And an hour later when she called back I could tell she was working hard to get my approval. The only thing I had to wait for was for a nurse at the insurance company to sign off. This amazing girl walked my insurance paperwork through the entire approval process just to help out a stranger. She even called the nurses to see about having my insurance request pushed ahead. I could not believe that this woman was willing to do all of this just to help me. With approval number in hand I said my goodbye's and thanked this girl for all of her hard work. When I called my RE's office with the approval number and what I consider good news they did not seem as excited as I was. The rude office manager seemed more pissed off that I was able to accomplish this then anything. She scheduled my appointment for 2:30 but then proceeded to tell me that I need to bring $200 to pre pay my insemination cycle this month. I wanted to curse her out but instead I said see you at 2:30!

When I arrived at my appointment I was filled with anxiety. Was I now hated by the office for pushing so hard to get what I want. Was I wrong for not wanting to skip this month. I began second guessing myself. But I walked into the office and put on a happy smile like everything was great. Every glance that I got from anyone on the staff made me question if I even wanted to deal with this RE's office any more. I was then called back to the ultrasound room and the first thing out of my RE's mouth when she walked in was "Are you really gonna make me work on Christmas?" No I said. If all goes as planned my IUI date should be either Friday or Saturday. Christmas is on Thursday so I think we will be ok. Besides I'm Jewish so Christmas is really not that big of a deal to me. The look on her face was priceless. It was a cross between did you really just way that to me and are you the devil? I laid on the table and she said well as long as you have no cysts I guess we are good to start your cycle. I could see where she was going with this. She was going to bullshit me and tell me I had a cyst just to get out having to go forward with this cycle. How do you know the difference between a cyst and a follicle I asked. Anything over 10mm would be a cyst since you are only on CD 3 anything under is a follicle. I watched as she counted and measured 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 I watched the entire thing and saw nothing over 5mm but I waited for her to lie. I think she could see that on my face so she replied well you have 5 follicles. I guess we are good to start. I could see she was not to happy with me. But I have been at this for far to long to let Christmas get in my way! I don't really feel like I was wrong for taking control of the situation like I did. I just don't think some people understand when not to get in the way of a woman on a mission. Truth be told I think I handled this headache pretty gracefully. I am sick of being pushed around and made to feel like I am not important. I pay to much money to my RE to be made to feel like just some piece of sh*t.

Snow in the Desert

I know snow is not exciting to most of you but out here in Las Vegas we NEVER see snow. So when I woke up this morning the last thing I expected was a call from my Mom saying it was snowing. I took some pictures because it's funny seeing snow on the palm trees.

Bad Day / Good Day

As you all know AF made a guest appearance last night. So I called me RE to inform her of the current events only to be told that I had to come in anyway for the beta because it was there policy. I dragged my butt across town to have my blood taken by my favorite nurse. The only nurse on this planet that has a hard time getting blood from me. After 3 sticks with a needle I proved to nurse needle happy that I do in fact have blood running through my veins. I had a brief encounter with my RE about what our plan would be when the test comes back BFN, and her response to me was that I shouldn't be so negative. I explained that I am not negative but a realist. AF is here, and from the looks of it she is here to stay! So I know that it's only common sense that AF = BFN. With that I left and waited confirmation of my results. She called me to tell me they were in fact BFN. Thankfully that was something I already knew and had expected, so it didn't hurt as bad as it could have. I asked her if we could up my meds since I am sick of this one egg BS and then my RE said the nastiest thing anyone has ever said to me. She said well Amy maybe you are only a one egg kind of girl. If she had been in my face I probably would have punched her. I am young and healthy and I refuse to believe my body is not capable of producing more then one viable egg per cycle. She agreed to up me to 175iu but said I needed to go on BCP because she was going on Vacation around January 8th. I immediately lost my cool and flipped out. Yelling that I refused "REFUSED" to go on BCP since I feel that is why I didn't respond well to my meds in this past cycle. I asked her is she had planned to be in town the week of Christmas to which she replied yes. And then I asked what the problem was then since AF was here today and my insemination seem to happen roughly around CD 15-16 December 27th and 28th that there was NO reason why I had to miss this month. Do you know what this woman had the nerve to say to me??? That I could not count today as day one since I was on progesterone. What the hell does that have to do with anything? Day one is the first day of full flow. That would be TODAY! We went back and forth with this for about 5 minutes before she said well we will make plans based off of when AF fully shows. (At one point I was going to ask if she wanted me to drop off my tampon so that she could see that I was having full flow but decided that might be just alitte to much). Tomorrow I am going to call her and let her know that AF was super heavy tonight so I know it was my day 1. If she says anything stupid I might drive over there to smack her. Why does it have to be so complicated.

I also got the results of my last genetic test back for my PAI-1 and it came back elevated. Confirming that when I do get pregnant I am going to have to go on Lovenox injections. It sucks but atleast there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

On to good news. A friend of a friend had some follistim she needed to get rid of and offered to sell me 6 boxes of 300iu follistim for $60 a box. I am so happy because upping my meds would have cost me big bucks. This was a total life savor. I am ready for IUI #3 and I am going into this cycle positive.

I must have been on the naughty list

Because AF is pretty much here and I get no Christmas miracle. I went way across town to the only pharmacy that carries my progesterone prescription and when I got home AF decided to stop by and say hi! What a waist of $50 that was. My plan now is to wait for her to be here in full force. That should be by later on tonight or tomorrow morning. Then tomorrow I will see if my RE thinks it is necessary for me to still come in for my blood test. Although I'm probable still going to have to go so we can make a plan for IUI#3. Oh well such is life.

12 DPIUI = BFN and spotting

I woke up this morning and the EPT was just taunting me to pee on it. So I did! I can't say I am surprised that it was a BFN. But I am going to continue with my progesterone and hope that when I test again (or go for my beta whatever comes first as long as it is not AF) that by some miracle it comes back BFP. For now I am going to watch PS I love you and hang out in bed. It's a lazy day! =) At least until I get a call from work with something that I need to do.

Edited:
So I decided to call me RE and see if I could come in tomorrow instead of Monday. I am so impatient! She said that it would be ok. But to be aware that it might be to early. I don't really care thought I NEED TO KNOW NOW!!!!!! it is driving me out of my mind. So I will let you ladies know as soon as I get the results. Although I still have a feeling it is going to be BFN.

To pee or not to pee ... that is the question

Since I am still on the subject of pee, today I am 10 DPIUI. I tested at 7 DPIUI just to make sure the HCG was out of my system. I mean I'm not crazy enough to POAS 7 DPIUI and hope that a BFP would appear (That's my story and I'm stickin to it). Back in July (IUI #1) I had my first beta at 12 DPIUI but it was only a 14. BFP but only a 14. This time around I don't go for my first beta until I am 16 DPIUI. There is no way I can hold out until Monday to find out this cycle is a bust. But I don't know when to test, or even if I should test. So I am posting a survey. Help me out here girls I have to much time on my hands and only 2 tests to pee on.

WTF?

I've seen some strange things in my day, but today I caught Molly talking a poop in my bathtub! Now I am not going to mention how about 5 minutes earlier I had taken her out for a walk and she also went #2 out there (ok well maybe I will mention it). So we come back in the house and I get on the computer to do some work. About 5 minutes passes and I think to myself is that bitch laying on my pillow again. You see the past few days I have caught her sprawled out on my pillow like she is the queen of my bed and that is her thrown. Not wanting to rest my face on where her butt has been I end up changing my pillowcase every night. Anyway so I walk in to my room and she is nowhere to be found. I walk into the bathroom to get a hair clip and in the mirror I see what looks like Molly in my shower. It strikes me as odd but I think nothing off it as she has not had an accident in the house in over 5 years. I glance down to check on her and sure enough there she is pooping in my bathtub. I throw her a magazine because she might as well have something to read while she is in there and I am definitely going to need something to chase her around the house with when she's done. I can't believe she made it as far as the bathroom and couldn't atleast use the toilet. I mean how rude!!!! And when I went to yell at her for defecating in my bathtub she gave me this face like "It wasn't me mommy, it was my evin twin". Just how I wanted to spend my Monday, Sick and sanitizing the bathtub for 3 hours. And yes I said three hours. I had to use comet with bleach then I had to use scalding hot water and I went back and forth with the two for three hours. Needless to say after the first 30 minutes I was high off the fumes. But on the plus side it did help un stuff my nose.

The worst part of this story is that it gave me a flash back. Fall of 2002 I was living in San Diego. My Fiance at the time we shall call him the insperminator (I will save that story for a later time) and I had just had a falling out and I had just kicked him out weeks before. I was all alone and bored. So without much hesitation I called an old guy pal of mine that I knew lived about 30 minutes away to come visit and keep me company. Yes he was an ex BF we had dated when I was in high school and had kept in touch. Anyway so the ex show up at my apartment with a movie, we order pizza and have a few beers and just hang out reminiscing. Hours pass and more and more alcohol is consumed and at this point I know his intention is to stay the night. But not wanting to make a bad drunken rebound decision I allowed him to sleep on the couch. We say our good nights and off in our own beds we went. I spent an hour or so tossing and turning in my bed questioning if I had made the right decision. Was it rude to put him on the couch. It's not like sleeping in my room meant that we would have to DTD. And just as I sat up to invite him in my room I heard him get up off the couch and walk into the bathroom. And that was when I heard him peeing. Only problem was I couldn't hear it hit water. It was just not the sound that pee makes when it hits the toilet water. I waited for him to flush but instead I heard the shower turn on. Was this man really going pee in my shower? He exited the bathroom and I just had to ask. Without hesitation he replied, "yeah sorry I was drunk and confused". That was the last time I spoke to that ex. Any man that would just pee in the shower I knew was just NOT the man for me. After I kicked him out of my apartment I cleaned the bathroom from top to bottom with comet with bleach but that bathroom was just never the same. Later I heard a story from a mutual friend of ours about how another ex of his caught him peeing in her kitchen sink. I mean who does this kind of stuff!!! Ahhhhh memories ........

Getting ready for the holidays

So I spent the day going through allllll of our Christmas stuff we have out in the garage, and started putting everything up. The inside of out house is now Christmas ready but the outside .... not so much! I had so much fun going though all of the things we have collected over the year. And can you imagine in only 2 years of marriage and 5 1/2 years together we have boxes upon boxes of decorations. Every year we go to the store and pick out an ornament that has special meaning to the both of us to add to our tree. The first Christmas after we were married we picked out a silver R (for our last name) with swarovski crystal to hang from the star at the top of the tree. And for our second Christmas we got a rottweiler angel because the puppy that I had gotten Patrick as a Christmas gift the year before had passed away. If I can break the hold that ESPN has on Patrick, I am going to try to get him to go with me over the weekend to pick out our new ornament. As well as hang the Christmas lights. I know this may sound funny but when we first bought Christmas lights I did not want to feel like a total trader to my religion so I made Patrick buy blue lights. Since blue is a Hanukkah color it made me feel better about myself. Then we added an 8 foot Santa Clause to the mix, and well there is no longer any sign that there is someone Jewish in this house. Oh well at least my MIL will be happy ... j/k.

Here are some pictures I thought I would share. My camera batteries were dead so I took all of the pictures of the tree and the house with my cell phone. They are not the best but oh well =)

Pigging out for my B-day

Tomorrow is my Birthday but since Wednesdays are bowling night Patrick asked if it was ok that we went out tonight instead. I have to tell you we went to this amazing restaurant that just opened up afew months ago. I have never been to a Brazilian steakhouse and either has Pat so this was a first and we had no idea what to expect (http://www.texasdebrazil.com). I must admit there was so much food when we left I felt like I had pigged out. I think I ate more tonight then I did on Thanksgiving. And now I feel like I am going to die from over eating. Ughhhhh I am so full!!!! Must go walk up and down the stairs to that the pound of meat I ate does not stick to my ass.

Question

I'm hoping one of you can answer this for me. As you all know I had my IUI on Saturday. I have been trying not to stress but I just feel like something went wrong. First off as I said in a prior post because of how bad IUI #1 was my RE gave me a prescription for valium it definitely helped calm my nerves but I never got O pains like I always do. So now I am concerned that I did not O. Then I got into a conversation with a friend that also goes to the same RE as me about my RE's sperm washing techniques. And it became clear to us that something is not right. Let me give you an example Patrick had 116 million swimmers with 79.6% motility after wash my RE said we ended up with 80 million healthy swimmers but my RE only inseminated me with 40 million. Reason being they only use 5cc when they inseminate you and that was exactly half of the swimmers. Why would they not use all 80 million swimmers. Is that odd to anyone else or just me???