I really do! Whenever I think things are going my way someone has to smack me back into reality. AF finally came after 41 long days she finally showed yesterday. I was so excited I called and ordered my injections not thinking that anything could go wrong. And sure enough everything always does! I go to see my RE today because tomorrow she is closed for Nevada day. Now understand I love Nevada (well not really but I like it alot) I have lived in this state for 15 years and well this is home. But on Nevada day everything is closed and it always falls on Halloween. Anyway so I am usually suppose to see my RE on CD 3 for my 3 day ultrasound so that I can start injections. But as it is Nevada Day on Friday her office is closed. Fing great! So I call yesterday to schedule my appointment, and no one could get back to me until 7:30 this morning to tell me when I could come in. Fine! But my entire morning was being planned around the arrival of my injections. So I tell the girl I will have to call as soon as my package arrives as the meds need to be refrigerated and if I am not here to sign for it Fed Ex won't leave it. At 11:30 my package arrives, I call my RE's office to schedule when I can come in and I am put on the books for 1:45. So far so good. They do my ultrasound and I get the all clear no cysts yeahhhhh. Then my RE turns to me and says well your going to start BCP on CD 3. WTF... I ask why and she informs me she is going out of town and will not be here to monitor the growth of the follicles. My heart sinks, I dress and go to meet her at the nurses station to pick up my BCP and go over the "IUI flow sheet". Then she drops another bomb on me. She received the rest of my genetic test results and there not good. I blank out and do not hear another word she says to me. It was almost like I was lost in thought. I look at her and say ok like I am listening to every word she says, but in truth I heard nothing. She hands me a prescription for Metanx and tells me to start taking it right away as well as baby aspirin. And that as soon as I get my next BFP she is placing me on daily injections of Lovenox. I stand there in disbelief. Why me, how come I can never catch a break.
So my cycle will now go as follows, since my lining was very thick my RE feels like today is CD 1. On CD 3 I will start BCP and on 11/14/08 I will stop my BCP. On 11/17/18 I go in for a baseline ultrasound and blood test and on CD 3 I will start 150IU of follistim. Return on 11/20/08 for my next ultrasound and blood test and again on 11/24/08. My trigger date and IUI to follow. I just can't believe that after 2 years and 4 month of TTC that I am going on BCP. This feels like the end of the world to me.
Thursday, October 30, 2008
I HATE TTC
Posted by Amy at 3:06 PM
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2 comments:
Amy,
I know how you feel! Still waiting for my AF. Just try to remember that each day brings us one day closer to our BFP. I know it will happen for us, just hang in there. I hate these slaps in the face though! I have noticed myself becoming very bitter lately and thinking about how far along we would have been. Hope it helps a little to know there are others out there like you. We'll get through this.
Shawna
Hugs Amy,
On the bright side, every bit of information good or bad that your doctor learns puts you that much closer to getting that sticky baby. I've knows several women over the years that took Levonox and carried their babies to term.
The BCP may work to your advantage. I have two ebuddies that are currently pg and just delivered after being on BCP for a cycle or two for cysts. When the cysts went away they did their injects and IUI's and conceived that cycle. One just had her baby last month and the other is due Dec. 29th.
I know it's hard to stay positive but try your best to do so. I'm keeping pp and pt for you.
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