I'm A ok =)

So I went to my RE today for the results from all of my blood work. All of the genetic tests came back negative and my thyroid is finally regulated. Yeah!!!! I have a sneaking suspicion that my thyroid was the reason behind my miscarriage, but I'm relieved to know that it is finally back on track. So now I wait for AF. I'm currently on CD33 13DPO I am going to wait until Friday if AF doesn't show by then, I intend on testing. But knowing that the miscarriage will cause AF to be late I am in no rush to see a BFN. If I get a BFN and AF is not here in the next 3 weeks my RE is going to intervene. Although I hate the idea of possibly having to wait that long I'm gonna do as told (not like I have much choice). Ahhhhh I feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. Things are looking up, finally!

If I can't have my own, I'll take this one!

I took my nephew to a local pumpkin patch today just so I could take some cute pictures of him in his little monkey Halloween costume. Reece loved checking out the pumpkins until we put him down to take some pictures. He hated, I repeat HATED the hay. We got some cute ones though so I thought I would share.

PS- Pictures of my fur baby Molly in her pig costume will be up as soon as I take some =) (I know I'm evil but she is just to cute)

What would you do???

The company that Patrick works for is being bought out by a big fortune 500 company, with over 6 thousand employees. That's great news for us because we were informed that once the deal is complete our insurance will be amazing as will be the employee benefits (sick/vacation days ...etc) Currently an IUI cycle through our current insurance company costs us $180 in co pays for the insemination alone plus an additional 1k for all of the medications. If it were only a one time thing it would not be such a big deal but now that we are going to be trying for our 2nd IUI it's starting to get pricey. Also now that my RE and I have decided on upping my meds as to produce more eggs I know we are looking at an additional $300 minimally. If the insurance through the new company is as good as everyone has been telling us, we could be looking at paying nothing for our medications. So here is my dilemma, today is CD 26 and I am 6 DPO I have a pretty good feeling that this is not going to be our month. With AF's impending arrival I need to make a decision fast. So I need to know what would you do, wait it out for the new insurance or go for it and fork out the $1,500?

Just do me!!!!!!!!!!

So I'm laying in bed last night watching TV when I feel cramps on my left side. Having felt ovulation cramps before I knew what was happening. Patrick was already fast asleep and I knew I had to make a move fast or miss out on this month completely. So I rolled over towards him snuggled into his chest and said .... do me! I know not subtle at all but as I have said before I am a woman on a mission. Patrick opened his eyes and said to me ..... Are you f*%$ kidding me! Not the reaction I was hoping for. I again said come on Patrick just do me and jokingly jumped on him. I guess I must of caught him off guard because he was hysterical laughing at me. When he caught his breath he asked me one last time to wait it out till next month. I looked him square in the face and said No, I can't do that being as honest as possible. I explained that at this point I need something to look forward to and at this point I have nothing. I think he realized that I was getting desperate so he appeased me and did as I asked. Afterwards I started feeling cramps on my right side so I am almost 100% sure that I atleast ovulated from one of my ovaries if not both. If I catch the egg(s) great if not I'm ok with that as well. I just need to trick my mind into a false sense of hope.

I got denied!

I tried to put the moves on Patrick last night and he shot me down. I never thought the day would come where I would throw myself on my husband and he would say ... No! I know he really wants me to wait till our next cycle. He is worried about having enough time for my body to heal. And doesn't really care that our RE said we can go for it. So I guess I will try to put the moves on him afew more times and if that doesn't work then I will just wait for my next IUI. Oh well!

RE Says go for it .... Yeah!

I had my follow up appointment with my RE today and it went really well. Everything from my miscarriage is out. And I have in fact had a period since the D&C. My uterine lining is building back up and I have two good eggs this month. One on my left side measuring in at 22.4 and one on my right side measuring at a 22 so I was told if I wanted to I have the green light to try the old fashion way and see if we get lucky on our own. The funny thing is I thought I ovulated yesterday but I guess I was wrong. Patrick thinks we should still wait it out until the next cycle but I think when he gets home tonight I'm going to jump his bones! I know he is still sick and all but I'm a woman on a mission.

I had a really great 30 minute conversation with Dr L (my RE) and we talked about how we want to proceed for the next IUI cycle. We talked about upping my meds and she agreed that it is a numbers game. So we are going to try for more eggs. I told her I am ok with multiples in fact I welcome it, as I never want to go through this ever again! So with that in mind I am now mentally prepared for AF to show. Unless by some miracle I end up catching one or both of the eggs this month. I like having a plan. It gives me something to look forward to. I have been in and out of this depression lately and I feel that a big reason why I feel this way is because I have nothing to look forward to. While Dr L and I were talking about the next cycle I couldn't help my eyes from tearing up. At one point I was singing don't worry be happy in my head just to stop myself from crying. I am tired of feeling like a mess, and I'm ready for happier days.

I want a newborn not a 27 year old

Patrick has a cold and if you ask him it's the end of the world. Now I know I wanted to have a baby but dealing with a 27 year old baby is a nightmare. Every five second he's whining about how he doesn't feel good. He refuses to blow his nose and has been talking through it for 2 days now. It's the most annoying voice ever that nasally whinny voice. Ughhh I could just smack him! Even worse then that is the snoring... oh the snoring. I try to roll him on the tummy in hopes that it will help that snarfing gurgley noise he's making but no. Nothing helps! And god forbid he asks me to get him something and I say ok honey in one second he says to me in that same nasally annoying voice... ehhhhh you don't love me ... you don't care that I'm sick. Are you Fing kidding me! You would think that he was on his death bed. When did I marry a baby. Why do grown ass men turn into babies when they get something as simple as a cold. If I ever acted like that when I was sick he would never allow it. Ohhhh gotta run the baby wants me to get him some water.